- There
was a church that had problem with
outsiders parking in its parking lots,
so they put up a sign: CHURCH
CAR PARK - FOR MEMBERS ONLY;
Trespassers will be
baptized !
-
" Free Trip to heaven.
Details Inside ! "
-
" Running low on
faith ? Stop in for a fill-up . "
-
" This is a ch
_ _ ch. What
is missing ? " ------ ( U
R )
-
" Try our Sundays.
They are better than Baskin-Robbins
. "
-
" Searching for a
new look ? Have your faith lifted
here ! "
-
" In the dark ?
Follow the son . "
-
" Dusty Bibles lead
to Dirty Lives . "
-
" Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon . "
-
"
An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, " For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets ."
-
" No
God-No
peace. Know
God-Know
Peace .
-
" People are like tea bags - you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are . "
- "
If you don't like the way you were
born, try being born
again . "
-
" If you're headed
in the wrong direction,
God allows U-turns
. "
-
" It is unlikely
there'll be a reduction in the wages
of sin . "
-
" Forbidden fruit creates
many jams . "
-
" Come work for
the Lord. The work is hard, the
hours are long and the pay is low.
But the retirement benefits are out of
this world . "
-
" If you can't sleep,
don't count sheep. Talk to the
Shepherd
. "